Maxims & Musings Which Matter: Part 1

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  • March 23, 2015

MAXIMS and MUSINGS WHICH MATTER:  PART 1

Lorisa Stein is a senior Ontario family law lawyer who, after more than a decade in the courts, moved to a settlement-focused collaborative family law practice. Through this lens and her interests in sports, design, mentoring, and ethics, she has developed some favourite truisms for her clients. Some food for thought to savour and offer to others.

  1. Worrying has never resolved a problem yet. It takes away energy which could be channelled towards uncovering and challenging fears. How the process moves forward towards a mutually acceptable resolution depends on what partners or spouses bring to the table. Engaging with each other and embracing the participation of neutral facilitators who ask really good questions intent on everyone learning more. Uncovering what may be difficult to express or to share helps to dislodge any negotiation roadblocks which may arise from time to time and calm any lingering emotional response.
  1. When in doubt, reach out. Unless there is a truly urgent matter to deal with right now, making any decision requires time to think about its impact on your life. And the life of those you care about. Seek advice now. Silence can be truly awkward. It can also offer you precious time to reflect upon what matters most to you. Discuss those reflections with your family law lawyer.
  1. Consider the ripple effect of actions you are contemplating doing today. How they will look a few years from now in your children’s eyes.  What will your children be pleased you put in place today?
  1. Don’t jump ahead with the thoughts swirling in your head. It stirs anxiety and builds on imaginary fears. Re-read #1. You’ll get lost for there is no way to know what happens to everything else that will be going on in your life down the road. We can’t really predict the future, so that old adage: one step at a time works very well to get you where you want you and your family to be. Smaller confident steps bring greater benefit to the whole family.
  1. Attack all facets of the problem with rigor. It is surprising how well the less familiar aspects of a problem can provide a wealth of ideas. Some of the most complicated child support issues can lead family partners to look at the problem from another perspective. And then walk away for a while and let the mind present the possibilities.

To schedule an appointment, please contact Lorisa Stein directly

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